Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Someday I'm gonna fly...

How often is it that we just want to be at the destination? I know that in my own life, I've found that the journey is the hardest part. Not necessarily because of the unwillingness to move forward, but more so because of the fear of the unknown, coupled with the loathing of waiting.

I don't like waiting. It is, in the essence, something that I've found to be frustrating and cumbersome. It seems to loom over me and I'm powerless to do anything about it...because I'm still waiting.

I can push it away, I can pretend it's not true, but in all honesty, waiting is something that is healthy for us.

If we were to receive everything we wanted immediately, or to be able to do everything we wanted to at that moment, or able to experience absolutely everything we wanted to, whenever we wanted to, then life would not be enjoyable anymore. It would have no meaning. Waiting teaches us patience, and it also helps us to grow in gratefulness. I waited two years until I was able to buy my laptop. Two years of earning, saving, and frustration. There were so many times when I wanted to throw up my hands and give up. There were so many moments where I would exclaim, upset, that I would never get it.

And then, when I could have purchased it, there were some situations that contrived to make it so I had to wait longer. And it was hard. But out of that waiting came good. I'm not going to go into details, but I ended up getting an incredible deal on my laptop and software, which I wouldn't have gotten had I not waited. I remember driving to get my computer, that old phrase, "Good things come to those who wait" just ran through my head over and over again, and I couldn't wipe the grin off my face for anyone.

The easiest part is after you've gotten to the point where you don't have to wait anymore. The hardest part is where you still do. Looking back on it, it all seems worth it, but in the thick of's hard.

As humans, our natural tendencies are not to wait. For one example, think of fast-food. It's fast and immediate satisfaction...but it's nothing special. It doesn't hold any thrill or splendor. It's simply there, and gone. We consume it, and then forget about it. When we don't wait, we lose some of that joy.

I've been pondering the truth of this verse lately...

Now the LORD said to Abram, "Go from your country and your kindred and your father’s house to the land that I will show you. And I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you and make your name great, so that you will be a blessing. Genesis 12:1-2

In all instances, the Lord is telling Abraham what He's going to do. He's going to show him a new land, make a great nation out of him, and bless him, so that He'll be a blessing. But He's saying, "I will." Not, "here you go! It's yours!" But, "It's going to happen. I can promise you that. But not right away. You're just going to have to wait."

It's so hard for me to accept that. I have to wait. That's the bottom line. It's really difficult, because I feel limited by some things in my life and I cannot change them at the moment. There's a peace that comes in accepting God's truths, and I'm really trying to find that peace. It's a process--a journey. It's not instantaneous. Even though I'd like to have it that way, it's not. And I just have to accept it.

But I also have to realize that life is good. I'm so blessed and, you know what? Life is sweet. If I get caught inside the mindset of always waiting, I'm not going to enjoy where I am right now. There's a balance to it all, and that's what I intend to find.

I'm going to enjoy today and then someday...I'm gonna fly.

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